Date: Sun, 18 Aug 2002 18:51:45 -0400 Sender: Dargon Project Writers Forum From: "Ornoth D.A. Liscomb" Subject: colonoscopy... Okay, folks, somebody put the idea into my head, and now it's time for everyone to pay: it's Orny's Colon Time! In all seriousness, I'm writing this because just about everybody here abuses colons and semicolons, and it's rediculous, because it's the simplest thing in the world. This ain't rocket science. So read on, because this is your one chance to learn it, and in just two minutes! But also do it because the pain of reading this email will be a *lot* less than continuing to listen to me correct you every single time you misuse 'em. Do it because this is an easy way to shut me up about the damned things once and for all! Okay, bend over and prepare to receive our transmission... 1). An INDEPENDENT CLAUSE is something that could stand on its own as a sentence, like "Billy watched some leaves falling". It has a subject and a verb. How hard was that? 2). Sometimes you wanna put two of 'em together. Let's take these examples: Billy watched some leaves falling. The leaves were red and gold. You could do it with a CONJUNCTION like "and", "but", and "or". Conjunctions can link independent clauses, but you use a comma to do it. Billy watched some leaves falling, and they were red and gold. CLAUSE COMMA CONJUNCTION CLAUSE Okay? Are we still together? I hope so, 'cos the review's over! 3). Sometimes you got two sentences/independent clauses that are so closely related to one another, and you wanna butt 'em right up against one another. You do that with a SEMICOLON. Billy watched some leaves falling; they were red and gold. CLAUSE SEMI CLAUSE. Don't use a semicolon unless you could theoretically replace the semi with a period and come out with two perfectly grammatical sentences, like you can with the above example. Semis are used when the two statements are very closely related, such as one causing the other's effect, or the second statement clarifying the first. By the way, a semicolon looks like this ';'. There *is* a case when you use a semi to separate items in a really long list, but don't worry about it. That's for the advanced class. 4). A colon is NOT used to link two independent clauses. A COLON is used to introduce a list or an explanatory fragment. Billy noticed the colors of the leaves: red and gold. CLAUSE COLON LIST. The colon follows an independent clause, but what follows it is usually NOT an independent clause. If you tried to replace the colon with a period, usually you'll wind up with a FRAG. "Red and gold" is NOT capable of standing on its own as a sentence! Think of the colon, which looks like ':', as an equals sign. It establishes an equality between what's on its left of it and what's on its right. Here, "leaves" equals "red and gold". That's all there is to it! See how GODDAMN SIMPLE it is? In case that wasn't enough for you, here are some other examples that illustrate the difference. Look at each sentence and ask yourself two questions: If I replaced it with a period, would it be two valid sentences? (semi!) Is what's on the right equal to or clarify what's on the left? (colon!) Here: That's Ornoth; don't encourage him. We've had one international Summit: Scotland in 2002. Orny's lectures are great; his delivery is interesting and succinct. I lost my phone: a black Sprint Touchpoint that I carry everywhere. Now get back to work; I don't expect you misusing these again! Use those two questions, and you'll be right more than 90 percent of the time, and I'll stop whining. Cool, huh? The difference between these two marks is so simple that they actually teach it to kids in grammar school. Please commit this tiny bit of information to memory, and if you do, I promise I'll shut up. Deal? This is your only chance! Seriously, I hope this helps folks. Thanks for reading it. -o