
| DargonZine | Volume 10, Number 5 |
he sun shone brightly upon me as I walked the streets of Magnus.
The warm light filled my body and drove out the chill of spring. I
enjoyed the beautiful morning on my way to the guardhouse, and it was as
if Cephas Stevene was walking with me, giving me warmth of conviction.
I took it upon myself to visit some of the prisoners and try to
bring them into the light of the Stevene. The people who came into the
Stevenic temple did so of their own free will and needed little to guide
them along the path of the Stevene. They wanted to walk in the Stevene's Light,
but prisoners were different. They neither walked in Stevene's Light
nor wanted to. Bringing them to God looked to be a difficult task,
and I wanted more than supplicating devout followers.
Not knowing where to start, I chose those prisoners who were
sentenced to death. I thought that their souls needed comfort the most.
It was these prisoners that would also be the most difficult to bring to
Stevene's Light. But in that aspect, I was wrong. Of the three prisoners
I met, all seemed willing to embrace the Stevene. It was as if at the
end of their life, they realized that they needed God's loving embrace.
While my visits weren't officially approved by the church (as my
duties did not include them), they weren't disapproved either. As I
approached the guardhouse to visit my fourth prisoner, two guards
stopped me.
"Another visit?" the first guard asked. "This is the fourth one.
What is it you seek to find, priest?"
"You have a new prisoner?" I asked the second guard, not wanting to
answer his inquiry. "Cephas forgive me," I prayed silently, "for I know
that this guard needs your wisdom, too, but I have only time enough for
the prisoner today." My work at the temple demanded most of my time.
"We have three new ones," the second guard answered.
"And all three are to be hanged?"
"Well, no ..."
"I am here to help those whose life is near an end," I said. "The
others can call for aid when they have atoned for their crimes. You have
a new prisoner, and I wish to speak with him." As the guard turned to
open the door, I hoped that my speech wouldn't find its way back to my
superiors. That all were deserving of salvation was a tenet of Cephas,
but I did not have the time to save them all.
"This is getting too routine for my liking," the first guard said.
"But, yes, we do have a new prisoner who is to be hanged tomorrow. Come
on, and I'll show you where he is."
"Thank you," I replied following the guard. We went through the
door to the guardhouse and left the shining sun behind us. There were
enough windows to keep the room brightly lit, but the sun could not be
seen. I still felt the warmth of the sun coursing through me, though,
and silently praised Cephas for that warmth.
Going through that room, we went into a back room where the light
diminished more. Here, there were shadows throughout where the sun's
light could not reach. Crossing this room, the guard unbolted a door. I
looked down those dark stairs, and the scent of mold and darkness wafted
up from below. A cold chill ran down my spine and my body shook
involuntarily.
"It looks so dark down there, today," I thought. "Cephas be with
me," I muttered aloud as I tried to wrap myself in His warmth.
"What was that?" the guard asked.
"I said it feels so cold in here today," I replied, ashamed that I
had not told him the truth. "Why does the cold seem to bother me so?" I
wondered. The chill of the basement seemed colder than before, and then
I realized that the sun had warmed my body so much that I felt the cold
more. "But why am I ashamed to say that I prayed to the Stevene for more
warmth? Is my faith so weak that the cold of a common room can dispel
it?" I had no more time for thoughts as the guard descended the stairs.
With the sun blocked by stone and only torches to show the way, I
walked down into the cellars. The daylight slowly eroded away to be
replaced by the damp, cold earth. Torches were set in the walls to light
the cellar, but there were not enough of them to see into all the cells.
My warmth was holding against the cold, stone walls, but I could feel
the dampness attacking me. It chiseled away at my outer fringes and
searched for entry into my body and my soul.
"He's in here," the guard said, pointing to a cell. I stepped
closer to look through the bars and into the cell. My eyes weren't fully
accustomed to the dark, yet, but in the far corner away from much of the
light, I thought I saw movement.
"Move over here where we can see you," the guard ordered. There was
a swirl of movement as a man stepped into the reflected torchlight. He
was tall with long dark hair that hung in the front covering much of his
face and shoulders. He wore a ragged shirt and torn pants, but no shoes.
His head hung down, and he walked forward as if each step pained him.
His body was bent over somewhat as if some large weight were pushing
down upon his shoulders. From his movements, I guessed that he was an
older man.
"This is brother Tyree, a priest of Stevene, and he's here to talk
with you," the guard told him before turning back to me. "Knock on the
door at the top of the stairs when you want out," he said and then left.
I did not watch the guard leave, as my attention was on the prisoner.
"Do you know who the Stevene was?" I asked as an introduction. When
there was no response, I continued, "Cephas Stevene was a man who
believed in the inherent goodness of all men. He considered all men as
his brothers and loved --" I was interrupted with a snort of derision
from the prisoner.
"Is something wrong?" I asked. The man's head was tilted down and
his face was still hidden.
"What do you know of love?" the prisoner asked in a dry, hoarse
voice, head still hung down.
"I know that --"
"You know nothing, priest!" the prisoner spat as his head came up.
"Don't talk about love!"
"What has happened that you do not believe in love?" I asked softly
as I saw the prisoner was a young man, not an older adult as he seemed
earlier.
"It's not me who doesn't believe, priest," he replied. He moved
forward to clench the bars. "Not me," he repeated staring into my eyes.
"Forgive me for being presumptuous. I see now that there is someone
in your life that you love," I told him, not looking away from his
stare.
"Yes, I loved someone once."
"Loved?"
"She's dead. Murdered," the prisoner sighed and stepped back.
Glancing at me, he said, "No, that isn't why I am here. I would never
harm her, but she is part of the reason that I'm here. It's a sad story,
priest. If you will listen, I'll tell it. If I don't tell it today, then
it will die with me, and no one will know the truth."
"I will listen, just let me get a stool so I may sit." I turned and
grabbed a stool. As I sat on the stool, it wobbled. Not wanting to fall
off, I was forced to move the stool until it was firm beneath me.
Looking up at the prisoner, I saw that he hadn't moved. Before I could
spur him on, he began speaking.
"I'm a farmer's son. If things were different, I would be a farmer
right now. A farmer in a very small village south of here.
"I met Tess --"
"Tess?" I interrupted.
"The woman I loved. Her name was Te'senth, but I called her Tess. I
met her one day while I was hunting in the forest near our village. I
got as close to a deer as I could and was just about to shoot it with an
arrow. I pulled the bowstring back to my cheek ...
The string touched my cheek as I aimed the arrow at the deer.
Concentrating on the deer, I didn't notice, or hear, the figure step
beside me.
"You'll miss," came a soft voice in my ear. I jumped in surprise,
let the string go, and watched as the arrow flew up into the air.
"What --" I screamed turning to the figure. My words were stuck in
my throat as I caught sight of the woman beside me. She was tall,
somewhat skinny, and beautiful with long black hair hanging down in
waves around her head to below her shoulders. Her eyes were dark and
glinted with mischief.
"Told you. I'm never wrong, you know," she said and her voice had a
melodic quality about it. She stepped back, smiled, and looked into my
eyes. I tried to say something, but couldn't find any words. When I did,
it was one syllable questions.
"Who?" I stammered.
"Now, if I told you that, what fun would it be?" she said impishly.
"Huh?"
"A conversation works better when both people are participating
fully."
I stared at her, not knowing what to say.
"If I go away and come back giving you plenty of warning, do you
think you'll be able to say something intelligent? Or are you always
this way?" she asked. I didn't know who this woman was, but there she
was, standing in front of me making fun of me. When I regained some
composure, I was mad.
"That was my supper you let get away!"
"Is food all that you can think of?"
"Is ... ah ..." I stuttered. She was getting the better of me and I
hadn't a clue as to who she was. "No, it isn't, but strangling unknown
women who sneak up on me does cross my mind at times."
"I'm Te'senth. So you can just put that thought out of your mind,
now," she said giggling. The sun shone through the trees and onto her as
she laughed. Like I said, she was tall and skinny, but not so that you'd
think that she was frail. When she moved, she had smooth graceful
movements. I watched her stand there laughing while the sun highlighted
her figure. It was then that my anger left, and I stared at her.
Thinking about how I must have looked when she spooked me, I
couldn't help but laugh. "I wonder where my arrow went?" I asked.
"As high as you jumped, it's probably in the tree tops," she
replied, and we laughed together.
"You looked so concentrated, I couldn't help myself," she told me.
"I do hope that you won't go hungry tonight. If so, I will pick some
plants for you to eat."
"No, we have enough food, but fresh meat was too tempting today.
Where did you come from?"
"My village is that way," she said pointing.
"No, I meant when you startled me. Was I that concentrated?"
"Yes, that's why I couldn't resist. You walked right by me and
didn't even notice me."
"I couldn't have done that. I would have noticed someone as
beautiful as you."
"Do you really think I'm beautiful?" she asked, a smile returning
to her face.
"Yes," I told her.
"No one has ever told me that I'm beautiful. I don't even know your
name."
"Huh? Oh, my name is Mal," I said.
"I have to go, now," she said.
"What? Why?"
"There you go again with those one word sentences. I have to get
back to my village. I shouldn't have stayed away this long. I will meet
you here again, if you wish."
"Meet me here? Again?" I asked full of hope.
"Yes, if you promise to practice speaking in full sentences," she
replied smiling. "In three days, I will meet you here."
"Three days it is," I told her.
"The morning of the third day," she said as she ran away from me
into the forest. "I'll give you fair warning, next time," she yelled as
she disappeared from sight. She was quick and nimble as she ran through
the forest. It was as if the forest was her home, and she was running
from room to room. I should have guessed what village she was from then,
but my head was fuzzy from her presence. It wasn't until later that I
learned who she was, and she never stopped amazing me. Never. Each time
that we met and every time that we were together, she showed me
something new -- something that I never knew existed.
"What were the things that she showed you?" I asked curiously.
"Ah, priest, the most amazing thing she showed me was her love for
*me*. It filled my soul and warmed my being even on the coldest nights.
Have you known a love like that, priest?"
I was about to answer, but the warmth that had filled my body
seemed to have mostly disappeared; replaced with a cold, damp chill that
flourished in the cellar. The chill had crept into me as I had sat
listening, and I hadn't noticed it until now. "Why is my warmth not
holding fast?" I thought. I wondered if my love for Cephas Stevene and
his teachings could be that weak?
"And did you meet her again?" I asked wanting to change the
subject.
"Yes, I did. But before that ...
I walked home in a daze. A wonderful daze, but a daze nonetheless.
I told my family about her when I got home. It was hard not to when my
mother noticed a difference in my attitude. She questioned me until the
truth came out.
It was a small village; word spread, and the teasing started. It
came from my brothers first, then from my friends, and finally from some
of the girls that were around my age. We had a small village, but it
didn't lack for children and young adults.
The most teasing that I got was from Nell. I didn't understand at
the time why she teased me so. Nell and I had grown up together. Where
one of us went, the other followed. I thought we had a great friendship,
and I couldn't understand why she had become so mean to me. Now, as I
look back at it, I think she loved me. But I didn't see that then
because I could only think about Tess.
I met Tess three days later, and then three days later, and three
days later again. I know it was like that, because I always wondered
about it. Three days between each visit and three visits -- something
seemed magical about it, but everything about Tess seemed that way. Each
time we met, she showed me something wonderful. The forest holds
enormous beauty if you know where to look, and she knew.
The first of the three visits happened on a foggy morning. I nearly
got myself lost getting to the same place, but I found it. She was there
waiting for me, and together we walked through the forest. I don't know
where we went, except that I followed her. When we stopped, it was atop
a hill in a what I guessed was a clearing.
"It's too foggy to see anything," I said impatiently.
"Shush and listen," she told me. I did, but couldn't hear anything
at first. When I did hear something, it began as a distant thump and got
louder quickly. The thumping changed to a whoosh as a large bird came
through the fog. It was an eagle and it flew right past our heads in a
slow, lazy way.
The fog had hid it until it was right upon us, and when it finally
came into view, it seemed unreal. Almost like it was an ancient monster
come to plague us. It seemed huge as it soared past us! And close! I
believe I could have reached out and touched it. But I didn't, and it
flew on by into the fog.
"There's two of them, here," Tess said. "They are mates and their
nest is close by. They fly here in the mornings looking for food."
"Amazing," I said as the eagle made a second pass by us, only a
little farther away. The fog was lifting slowly. "Not many people have
seen them, have they?"
"No, not many. But even fewer have seen what waits for us when the
fog lifts."
"What? You have already stolen my heart, are you going to blind me
with wonders as well?"
"Stolen your heart, have I? I thought I had what was freely given.
Do you mean to tell me that I am a lowly thief in the forest?"
"No, I ... um, what I meant is that I ... I love you."
"And I, you," she replied. "Now, be quiet. The fog is lifting and
we must be still." I stared at her while the fog lifted. I looked at
each line on her face, each twist of her hair, each breath she took
until she pointed in front of us. I moved my gaze slowly to look in the
direction she was pointing. At first, I saw nothing, but when a breeze
blew more of the fog away, I saw it. A large stag stood grazing in front
of us. It was larger than any stag that I had ever seen. I started to
count the pointed tines on its antlers, but kept losing the count.
"It is a Great One," she whispered. The stag lifted its head and
looked at us. Not just looked in our direction, but it was as if it was
looking us over -- judging us. I could see an intelligence in its eyes.
"He is beautiful," I whispered to Tess. The stag snorted as if it
heard me.
"Yes, he is, but he gets upset when you tell him," she replied and
the stag bounded away.
That was but the least of the wonders that she showed me. I will
not tell of the other two for they are special to me, and to her. It was
after the third morning that she started to visit me in my village.
"You kept meeting her? Even after the three times?" I asked
confused.
"Yes. Those three mornings were a test, I think. Her way of testing
me, or her village's way. I don't know. At that point, I would have done
anything for her." Mal said as he grabbed the bars of his cell.
"Anything." His hands squeezed the bars tighter and his eyes widened.
The torchlight reflected off of his face and there was a wild glint in
his eyes. He relaxed, let go of the bars, and turned around. "She was my
life," he said. "And I miss her."
"When she came to my village to see me, I knew that I wanted to be
with her the rest of my life. But when she came to the village ...
That was when the trouble really started. Nell hated having her in
the village with me. Rumors about Tess made their rounds -- 'Tess is a
forest spirit', 'She bewitches me', and 'She charms everyone into
thinking she is harmless' were a few. I knew that Nell had started them,
but there was nothing I could do to stop them. I tried, and the more I
tried, the more Nell became spiteful toward me.
I pulled her aside one day, and made sure we were alone. I
confronted Nell about the rumors, but she denied everything. I asked her
why she was doing this, and she stared at me. Had your Stevene been
there, priest, things might have turned out different. But he wasn't,
and he didn't care about our lives. He just didn't care.
Nell started to say something to me, and I saw a tear form in her
eye. I didn't know any better, priest, or I would have known from her
look that she loved me. But I didn't know, and I asked her why again.
She clamped her mouth shut and her tear ran down her cheek. She wiped it
away with a quick brush of her hand, and then yelled that she hated
Tess. That she'd say whatever she wanted to about Tess. I told her to
stop, and that if she didn't, then we would no longer be friends. She
turned red in rage and started to say something. Instead, she clamped
her mouth shut, turned, and ran away.
The rumors never seemed to bother Tess. She came to the village to
visit me and that is what she did. She seemed above all the petty lies,
and I loved her even more for it.
One day while we were walking in the woods, I gathered my courage
for a single question. The most important question of my life.
"Tess?" I began hesitantly.
"Yes, Mal," she replied and stopped walking. She turned to me and
said, "You have a question for me, don't you? An important one."
"Will you be my wife," I blurted out, knowing my courage would not
last.
"Do you love me, Mal?" she asked.
"Yes, I love you."
"I love you, too, Mal. And I knew that this day would come. Before
I give you my answer, I would like to show you my village, my home, and
my family. Will you come?"
"I would follow you anywhere," I promised her. She laughed, grabbed
my hand, and we walked deeper into the forest. It became darker as the
trees blocked the sun, and we walked even deeper into the forest. I had
never been in this part of it before, but the trees were old -- very
old. She stopped before an ancient oak.
"You must promise to never tell anyone what you will see beyond,"
she said.
"I promise," I replied. I would promise her anything that she
desired.
It was beyond that oak that I fully realized who she was. I should
have known before, but my love blinded me to it. I will not break the
promise that I made to her, but I will tell you this. She was an Eelail;
a Dopkalfar. If she had not been holding my hand, I would have run. It
was both beautiful and frightening, the sights beyond that ancient oak.
By the Stevene you hold holy, priest! It was like nothing I'd ever
seen before. She stood beside me throughout it all. And throughout it
all, my love for her grew stronger.
The end result of that encounter was that they would tolerate me.
Not because I was special, but because they respected Te'senth and her
wishes. We would be husband and wife by my laws, but not by theirs. No,
there was no changing their minds on that point.
Many things went on while I was there, but I did not understand
much of it. Tess translated what was needed when it was needed. I spoke
only when asked a question, and I think that may have earned me some
respect.
And Tess -- Tess was bright and lively and glowing. I watched her
as she spoke. Well, it was more like singing, to me, but she was
beautiful. And when we left, I looked at her in a new light. One filled
with wonder and awe.
"Are you saying that the legends are true?" I asked incredulously.
"There really are Eelail?"
"Yes!" Mal said turning around. "The legends are true. Most of
them, anyway. They were Dopkalfar, and if they exist, why can't the
Ljosalfar exist also?
I didn't see much of their village or how they lived, but I did see
them. They can almost pass as one of us. They are a bit taller, though;
a little skinnier with darker hair and dark eyes, too."
"But the legends say that no one has ever seen a Dopkalfar and
lived. The Dopkalfar hate humans," I replied.
"If it wasn't for Tess," Mal said, "they would have killed me. They
*do* exist! Not only that, but my heart belonged to one. I was going to
marry her. When I returned home, I didn't tell my parents about her
being an Eelail, but I did tell them ...
That I had asked her to marry me and she had said yes. They were
not happy at the idea as they had heard the many rumors, too. I tried to
explain to them how wonderful she was, but they wouldn't listen. They
gave consent, but mostly because they knew they couldn't stop it. It was
a long night for me as I couldn't sleep. Sometime late in the night, I
managed to drift off. It didn't do much good, because the town bell
suddenly rang out. Jumping out of bed, I ran outside to see the bright
flames of fire burning a neighbor's house. The villagers were moving to
put out the fire. There was a line of people extending from the town
well to the burning house. Buckets of water were passed quickly from
person to person, but it was in vain. The house burned brightly and the
fire would not be quenched. It burned through the rest of the night and,
by morning, was finally sated.
Five people died in the fire -- Amil, his wife Gail, and their
three children. The last of the flames had just been put out when Tess
arrived.
"There's the witch!" Nell shouted as she pointed to Tess. "She is
the cause of the fire; showing up to ensure her evil deeds were done!"
"Stop!" I yelled. "That is not true."
"I told you," Nell said to the gathered crowd. "I told you she was
evil! Five are dead because you wouldn't listen. She is a witch and a
demon's daughter!"
Tess stood and did not utter a word. I don't know why, but she
remained calm and quiet. I think the villagers took this for a sign of
guilt as their mutterings started to support Nell's lies.
"What are you doing?" I screamed. "Tess did not do this!" Their
mutterings became louder as Nell continued to spout lies. I tried to
tell them; I really did. When they moved to grab Tess, I fought to hold
them back. But there were too many of them. I couldn't believe that the
people who I grew up with -- people who I knew and trusted at one time
people who lived with me -- became an angry mob, intent on taking my
love's life. I fought, I clawed, I bit, and I raged; but it was useless.
They took her. It was when they put the post in the ground on the
ashes of the burned house that I realized what they intended. I pleaded
and begged them not to do this. My own father turned his back to me as
Tess was tied to the post. She never uttered a word as they tied her
there. Even when Nell spit in her face, she merely blinked.
I was bound and held in place as they lit a fire around her. She
looked at me as the fire was lit. I couldn't look away and watched as
the flames started to engulf her.
"They burned her?" I blurted.
"Yes," Mal sighed. "They took her, tied her, and burned her. I
watched as the flames ate her piece by piece. As the wind picked up and
stoked the fire," Mal's voice began to crack, "As the fire burned away
my love both inside and out. But that wasn't enough -- the wind carried
the stench of it to me. It lay around me as I watched her burn and heard
her screams.
"Where was Cephas Stevene then, priest!" Mal screamed as he grabbed
the bars and tried to shake them loose. "Where was his God! Where was
this love you proclaim! *Where!*" Mal shouted at me.
"I ... I don't know," I said feeling the chill seep deeper into my
body. "Cephas," I prayed silently. "Oh, Cephas, how could you allow this
to happen? And why do you not drive this cold from me? Warm my soul!
Drive away this cold!"
"She never stopped burning and ...
That sight was forever scarred into my mind; her screams still echo
in my head; the scent still lingers in my nose. After the fire was gone,
they untied me and left me there on the ground. I got up, left the
village, and didn't look back. I had no family now, for the people in
that village were as strangers to me. Walking in the woods, I knew what
I had to do and feared it. I had to tell her family what happened. I
knew that they would surely blame me and kill me, but life was not worth
much to me now.
I searched for bells looking for the place Tess had taken me. As
the sun started to set, I finally found it. It was only by the Eelails'
wishes did I find them, and for the second time in my life, I entered
their village. For a second time, I vowed never to talk about what was
beyond that ancient oak. What I can tell you was the outcome of my
visit. One of the Eelail translated for me. They knew that Te'senth was
dead, for they had heard her death screams. I did not understand what
that meant and did not have the courage to ask. What they didn't know
was how or why, and they turned to me for that. I told them the whole
story and spared them nothing. Part of my soul died with Tess and I
wanted to die -- only I hoped it was a quicker death than Tess'.
They didn't kill me, nor did they torture me. They never hurt me at
all, except for the fact that they told me their plans. They intended to
attack the village, kill all the people there -- men, women, and
children -- and burn it. Even though I had never intended to see my
family again, it was like a cold slap of winter water learning that they
were going to be murdered.
The Eelail didn't bind me; they knew there was nothing I could do
to stop them. Instead, they took me with them. I don't know why. Maybe a
twisted vision of vengeance in their minds, maybe to punish me in their
way, but I could think of maybes all day and I still wouldn't know. What
I knew, and saw, was the attack on my village. I watched as they swiftly
and methodically slew everyone there. I saw my family die.
After everything was over, I ran away. I wanted to get as far away
from there as I could. I hoped that the further I ran, the further the
memories would be. I ran to the next town. Distance wasn't helping, so I
found an inn and tried to drown my sorrows in cheap ale.
Bells
later, and I don't remember how many, Nell walked into that
inn. It was like seeing a demon come to life to punish me for all
eternity. I don't know how she escaped the massacre at our village,
priest. I had thought everyone dead. But there she stood, healthy and
whole, yelling at me.
"You twisted, evil, gutless man!" she yelled. "You killed every one
of them! You killed my mother, my father, my sisters, my brothers, and
every one else! You're --"
I don't know what happened then -- I lost control and before I
realized it, I slit her throat. Blood poured out everywhere. I watched
her eyes open wide and then she fell onto the floor. Her blood was all
over me and I stood there in shock. I looked down at the bloody knife in
my hand and got sick. Vomit and the knife hit the floor.
When the guards arrived, I was still standing there in her blood
and my vomit. Everyone heard what she said. I was sent here for the
King's justice.
"You didn't tell anyone about the Eelail, did you?" I asked.
"No. I couldn't. Most people believed I was in league with bandits
who raided and burned the village. I was even accused of being a
Beinison."
"Yes, I remember hearing something of a search for bandits who
raided a village in Arvalia. That was about you, then. Your sentencing
would have been less severe had you told them your tale," I stated.
"You think they would have believed me? They wouldn't, and would
have laughed at any mention of Eelail. Tell me, do *you* believe me?"
His question went to my very soul and the cold flooded through with
it driving away the last of my warmth. Chills ran through my spine and
limbs. The stool that I sat on seemed a cold and lifeless thing that was
draining my soul away. My warmth had left me. "Cephas!" I pleaded
silently. "Guide me! Help me!" Before I could answer, Mal turned away
from me.
"I promised Tess that I would follow her anywhere," he said, "and I
will. I'll be hanged soon and follow Tess to where she went. I want to
die. There is nothing in this world here for me, now. The woman I loved
was murdered, my village turned on me, my family was murdered. And for
all that I saw, priest; for all that I watched being destroyed in front
of me, you would think that I would have learned something. But I didn't
-- I also murdered. Now, I have nothing left."
"I am sorry," I said as I stood. The cold sapped my strength, and I
suddenly wanted out. I wanted to see the light of the sun. I wanted to
feel its warmth. "Where are you Cephas?" I screamed silently. "Why have
you left me here in this dark, cold room? Why did you bring me here to
hear this?" I made for the door with my faith and my questions trembling
in my mind.
"You didn't answer."
"Answer what?" I asked turning around.
"Do you believe me?"
"Stevene help me," I prayed silently. "I don't know," I said
honestly, and then hurried up the stairs.
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I watched Mal's hanging. My unwavering devotion to the Stevene was
shaken. My solid faith changed to questions and doubts; things I would
have to confront if I wanted to turn my faith back around. Why was he
not with me when I was in the cellar with Mal. Why do I still feel the
cold in my soul from that place? Cephas had wandered the kingdom helping
people -- all kinds of people. Even after he was murdered, he came back
from the dead to help those who doubted him. He was the Stevene.
I watched Mal being led to the rope. He didn't utter a word as it
was placed around his neck. As he fell, the rope tightened, and there
was a loud crack. A crack that shook within me, also.
"Cephas be with him," I thought trying to shake the coldness within
me. "Cephas be with me," I whispered as I turned to leave.